this silent place

gotta blog something before i'm off to study. (seriously! i can't get rot like this anymoreeee!)

anyone from my school, you can walk pass my class at 201. this class, sort of creepy. first, even digging my pen from pencil case makes HUGE sound and kinda interrupted the silence of the class. second, nobody talks. everyone's like writing scribbling studying pressing calculator etc but never talk. erm, maybe a little 2-3 sentences conversation once a thirty minutes or so? third, WHAT THE HELL I AM SO DEPRESSED! because i can't find a person to talk whenever i feel like sharing. uh.

yes, i'm determined for entering vet school. but that doesn't mean that i should studying like a maniac! i want to study for interest, for knowledge, not just plain s.t.u.d.y and exams. it's kinda pushy i know, studying SOOOOO much and so detailed in such a short time. but.. is there a need to be so... so... study-ish?

and i also became one of the them one who don't make a sound and scribble and fuck life cos' i find no other fun anymore in this silent creepy place. i feel disgusted and ewww-ed.now, i get annoyed by any freaking sound while i'm studying. e.g. singing, mumbling. hella annoying that i can kill a cow.

uh. i really don't like how pushy this is. i'm mentally ill. and breakdown once or twice in a month. it's getting frequent that i feel like dying idk. actually there's still some other main factors but then i feel like this atmosphere is helping the breakdown to be so frequent.

uh. no fun at all. i hate no fun. i like to play. i don't want to study my ass out.

*show must go on never stop*